Once upon a time in a kingdom not unlike this one there lived a Tapper. A Tapper is one who taps the spigot into a wooden cask of wine or keg of beer at a tavern or pub. It takes a very specialized skill to make sure not a drop is wasted in the effort. The tools of the Tapper are few yet a Tapper's services remain in high demand at houses of libation and private wine cellars far and wide.
One such Tapper, Nipper Kinappy, was much beloved in his hometown of East Cappytuckles Fork. "There goes Master Tapper Nipper Kinappy of East Cappytuckles Fork" they used to say and how right they were. They knew him by the ruby "East Cappytuckles Forker" cap he always wore and the silver-headed tapping hammer he carried with him wherever he went. It was actually a small silver-headed claw hammer, but he was the best Tapper around and no one cared to debate it.
Until the day that a certain lady came to town in search of the Pride of East Cappytuckles Fork Master Tapper Nipper Kinappy. She was a young and beautiful woman of grace and breeding and yet she seemed particularly anxious to find the Fork's Master Tapper Nipper. She even went into his favorite haunt, The Silver Tap, to speak to him personally.
"My name is Lady Maylay Fanaylay-Day and I need your help. I have been given this and it has made my life a living terror. I will give myself and all my fortunes to the man who can help me." At that she pulled out a crystal skull from a velvet bag. "It was given to me by a gypsy and I think it's cursed. Can you help me?"
Nipper looked at the carved crystal skull and regarded it for a moment before taking out his hammer and smashing it to bits.
Nipper and Maylay lived in health and prosperity happily ever after and the people still spoke of how there never was a Tapper like that Lady Maylay Fanaylay-Day's crystal skull smashing Nipper Kinappy the most famous Master Tapper of East Cappytuckles Fork.
Reprinted by permission from author
Drawing and Story by G. Bennett Ulrich
(the drawing came first) 2001
2003 Death House Press